Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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