I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
