Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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