Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.