Texts From Last Night

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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?

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  (513): Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude? http://tfl.nu/2xw8
  Replies (13) Good night (528) Bad night (1271)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady

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  (202): i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady http://tfl.nu/uziv
  Replies (21) Good night (1884) Bad night (566)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party

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  (301): i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party http://tfl.nu/u2ba
  Replies (3) Good night (720) Bad night (1834)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.

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  (207): A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card. http://tfl.nu/ujy9
  Replies (11) Good night (8151) Bad night (1135)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.

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  (909): oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas. http://tfl.nu/s25p
  Replies (8) Good night (852) Bad night (3195)
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  (619): View more from California

  surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.

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  (619): surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk. http://tfl.nu/u5eo
  Replies (4) Good night (1201) Bad night (3327)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work

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  (208): I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work http://tfl.nu/ffxc
  Replies (20) Good night (1797) Bad night (3160)
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  (619): View more from California

  the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting

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  (619): the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting http://tfl.nu/ov15
  Replies (9) Good night (1444) Bad night (794)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.

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  (717): Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated. http://tfl.nu/4rw5
  Replies (7) Good night (910) Bad night (1843)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table

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  (206): I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table http://tfl.nu/jkfk
  Replies (5) Good night (2416) Bad night (1093)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.

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  (813): she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by. http://tfl.nu/df84
  Replies (5) Good night (1350) Bad night (1061)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...

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  (507): I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs... http://tfl.nu/9q2b
  Replies (6) Good night (1173) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.

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  (360): It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls. http://tfl.nu/eao3
  Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.

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  (970): Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack. http://tfl.nu/afhg
  Replies (2) Good night (385) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.

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  (970): There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner. http://tfl.nu/d05g
  Replies (2) Good night (425) Bad night (218)

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