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after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
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