I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I showed him my bush... on skype.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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