Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize