sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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