Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
