Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
