He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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