Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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