my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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