While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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