Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize