I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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