If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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