so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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