i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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