If that was your dad, he is hot
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
