so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
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Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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