somebody snuck up and got me drunk
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
