and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Randomize
