I'm drive I can fine osifer
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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