super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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