Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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