you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
that is very illegal...i love you.
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