guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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