just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize