were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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