Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
you never un-have a 4some
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize