He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
