Pregnant stripper...not hot.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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