You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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