Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
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