i don't like sucking hair
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
meet me or not, i'm out of control
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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