Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Randomize
