Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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