My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
BRING THE BAGELS
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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