She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
