they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
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i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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