I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
