If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
