Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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