Duck Duck Cougar?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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