i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
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I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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