your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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