a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
