Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Randomize