Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
