it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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