Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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