you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
